The Hangovers: Worst. Nights. Ever.
The New Year often starts with a handful of resolutions which we seldom keep. And, with the company I keep, the resolutions I hear pour forward usually involve less drinking, less partying, less late nights, less indulgence and all those wonderful things that are so easy to do in the Castro and surrounding areas.
Most "worst night ever" experiences seem to have roots in the Castro. Justin O’Neil, a long time Cheer SF member and aspiring stand up comedian, was poised to celebrate his 30th birthday party starting at Trigger. O’Neil, who is proudly clean and sober now, is one of the few who are not shy about their past.
"I got filthy drunk the night before, made some bad decisions and wound up getting high on drugs, went to two all-night sex parties and took Viagra, which I had an allergic reaction to," explains O’Neil.
With "allergic reaction" in tow, i.e. a never-ending boner in his pants, O’Neil continued on to his birthday gathering at Trigger, Badlands and a slew of neighborhood venues, where neither the partying with his friends nor the party in his pants would let up anytime soon.
"I ultimately blacked out, woke up with a stranger in my bed and still high, and still with a boner," exclaims O’Neil. "I had to go to the hospital to have my dick drained and face the worst humiliation of my life."
How did I get home? It was all a blur...
Justin is also a veteran of the restaurant and bar business and recalls a recent customer who drank a little too much through the course of her evening.
"Eventually, the woman went from zero to obliterated in about five seconds and passed out on her boyfriend. I dropped the check, telling the guy that he had to get her out of there. At that moment, Sleeping Beauty decided to wake up, look me dead in the eye, say ’I’m sorry.’ She then threw up all over the banquet and table."
Of course, Justin was the one who had to clean everything up, but he says while he was gagging, that wasn’t what bothered him the most. "I’m the oldest of four. It takes more than that to fully gross me out. What bothered me the most was that the cheap fuck left such a piss poor tip; ten percent!" Clearly, it was not a good night for anybody involved.